The power of being able to control your emotions

Women are emotional beings. It’s because of the way our brain is wired and because of our high levels of the hormone called Oestrogen.

The hormone Oestrogen is the reason why we love to nurture, care, talk about our feelings and emotions. Oestrogen also causes us to look for safety and certainty.

More often than not, women want to talk about their emotions and feelings to solve a problem.

This way we are trying to get rid of that unpleasant feeling about something that puts us at unease. When we are experiencing unease the feeling of uncertainty usually comes with it.

Being uncertain makes us feel unsafe. 


Put together in one sentence this means:

“Uncertainty is an emotional state

women struggle to be in because feeling safe is one of a woman’s love needs.”



On the other hand, as you can probably guess, certainty and feeling safe are not a man’s prior love needs.

Instead, quite the opposite is the case.

Men have high levels of Testosterone. This leads to them loving to compete, chase, to have a challenge, a thrill etc. Safety and certainty is not one of their prior love needs!

“This fundamental difference between women and men often leads to women giving men what they

enjoy receiving themselves.”

So they would show the guy that they care and that they love them way too soon as they want to make the guy feel safe.

But since certainty and safety are not a man’s priority, this backfires on us, as for men this makes us look needy and clingy!

So what does this mean when you are dating men and how can you use this for you?

It means that:

  • You are not supposed to make it too easy for a guy to get you.
  • You are not supposed to wear your heart on your sleeves.
  • You don’t show him that all you want is him and just him only after a few months of dating.
  • You don’t talk about a future together with him too soon.

To sum it all up:

“You need to learn to be in control of your emotions and to act logical.”

Men are logical beings, not emotional ones. If you are not in control or your emotions the risk is high that he will lose interest in you very quickly.

Also, if you are acting upon your emotions will often make you look crazy in his eyes.

It’s because guys cannot comprehend what is going on when we are acting emotionally. It’s jut too much for them and you will end up in the “not girlfriend material, needy and crazy nutcase draw”.

Men need uncertainty to really fall for you!

“When a man is too sure too soon about you having fallen head over heels in love with him and you making him the centre of your life he will pull away.” 

I’m not saying, that you should be playing games and behave like a bitch.

All I’m saying is, that if you want to make a guy fall for you, you need to keep your emotions to yourself for a while.

Men love the thrill, the challenge, the hunt, the mystery.

Usually they don’t even know themselves that uncertainty has intrigued them to madly fall in love with you. 

Try it!

If you’ve liked this post you will likely find my post about “How men are testing women” and “5 mistakes women make with men” helpful as well. 

Join my women’s only Facebook group Mindful Seduction with like minded women. 

Also, let me know what part of this post you find particularly helpful by tagging me, @elle_mio in your your Instagram Stories or your Instagram pictures.

Mio xx

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