To get capture a man’s heart you need to know when to give him space and when you can get close to him. Balancing giving space and being close can be hard. Especially when you really like him, because all you want to do is be with him.
Giving him space can give you the feeling of not contributing to the relationship. It may even make you feel really uncomfortable leaving you worrying, that he may lose interest. Which tempts you to initiate contact, arrange dates, tell him how much you like him.
Because the last thing you want is being perceived as passive, or even worse – boring by the man you fancy. You’re wondering whether there is ever a time when should lean in to be closer to him. You’re struggling to find some kind of balance and you’re not sure how you can show him that you like him in a feminine way without chasing him away.
First, I want to reassure you that you’re not alone. So many women are struggling with balancing between giving space and getting closer. When to initiate contact, if you even should initiate contact, what to text him, how to text him, how often to text him. When initiating will be perceived as chasing, how you can know when you should give him space etc.
I’ll help you to balance between giving space and moving closer to him. Today I’m sharing three powerful tips to make sure you’ll never find yourself chasing or pursuing a man.
How to give him space
Tip #1: In the early dating stages (up to three months) it is always better to lean back.
In the early dating stages, which I consider as up to the first three months, it is always better to give him space. This is crucial as you taking up too much space during that time will make him lose attraction. During this time you should observe who he is and what has to offer you and how much energy he invest in you. Your part is to focus on building an emotional connection with him. YOu’re doing this by being warm and receptive when he contacts you. By responding positively he will start to associate you with a positive experience which will lead him to contact you more often in the future.
Tip #2: Ask yourself whether you wanting to contact him comes from a place of lack or anxiety.
When you find yourself spiral thinking as to whether you should contact him, get out of your head and feel into your body. Ask yourself why you want to contact him. Is it because you haven’t heard from him since a few days and you’re anxious that he may have lost interest? Do you feel lonely desperately wanting to see him to get reassurance? If so, this is a strong indicator that you shouldn’t contact him. If you do he will be able to sense your desperation, which is an attraction killer.
Also what usually happens is, you’re not getting the responds you’ve been hoping for. This will make you feel worse. More often than not this ends in drama which will push him away.
Instead, try to get to the bottom of why you’re feeling lack. Because missing him from a healthy state of mind will not make you feel desperate to contact him. The root of feeling lack and desperation always comes from a place of fear and the expectation for him to fill your whole. But this is your job to do, not his.
Tip #3: The 80:20 rule to give him space
I hear you. You don’t like reading about rules when it comes to dating and men. However, the 80:20 rule works really well as a guidance until you’ve built the confidence as to when you should initiate contact. So, if you feel like playing games that’s a sign that you definitely should consider this rule.
Pay attention to whether he makes consistent effort to talk to you and to date you.
Whether his actions are matching with his words and
Whether he shows up as his best self.
If so, you can send him a little message every now and then.
It is not always easy to give him space and to be the receiving part in a relationship. Particularly when you’ve met a great guy and really like him. Seeing dating as you observing what a man has to offer you will help you to not waste your energy feelings with the wrong man.
Continuously being rejected by men and even ghosted leaving you behind confused and hurt. Doubting yourself and feeling unloved and unwanted.
If you’re finding balancing giving space and getting close to him challenging you need to keep 80:20 rule in mind otherwise it’s a sure way to chase him away.
And always remember, you’re the prize!
If you are confused about men and need more support to understand men and to attract high quality men, I would love for you to join my women only facebook group. Just click this link to join.
I’ll see you there.